MEN Redefines Greater Manchester Boundary

Todays MEN contains a report on the number of parking tickets issued in Greater Manchester, identifying the different areas within Greater Manchester and the numbers issued by them.






The MEN now defines Greater Manchester as only containing the following areas:

• Manchester,
• Salford,
• Bolton,
• Trafford,
• Tameside and
• Rochdale.

There was great celebration is Stockport as people finally got definitive proof of what they always believed, they were not part of Greater Manchester as far as the MEN is concerned. Said the leader of Stockport Council, Mr A.Dingle-Booth 'Finally the MEN has confirmed what we have always believed, they do not give a shit about us in Stockport -paying only lip service to our hard working residents. Now they have finally confirmed this, we can take action to stop them selling their tawdy daily claptrap paper in our town.'

However not everyone was happy, one resident who did not wish to be named for fear of reprisals and derision said 'But that means I would have to travel into Manchester to get the local rag -this is typical of Manchester's Labour viewpoint, they hate us LibDem areas that do not conform to their view despite making us pay for every edition.'

Manchester Council leader Sir Dick Lease-it-back distanced itself from the MEN actions saying 'Stockport provides a lot of funding into the economy of Manchester City Centre whilst not asking for anything in return. If Stockport's money was not chanelled into our transportation system we will have to raise council tax even further.'

Well there we have it, Stockport is no longer part of Greater Manchester and plans are afoot to make it a district of Spain, hoping to import better weather.