Thursday, 31 January 2013

Stalybridgers 'Execute' Speed Camera

News has come in through Twitter, that Stalybridgers have carried out an execution on a Speed Camera.  In a chilling reminder of the 'Necklace Killings' carried out in South Africa during the 80s, a torch lit parade of muttering, superstitious locals approached the Camera, and put a burning tyre around its neck, before running away into the filth of their burrows.

"I don't like the way it looks at me", said one.
"If it flashes at you, it steals your soul and makes you infertile", said another.

Freidrich Engels described the "shocking filth, and the repulsive effect of Stalybridge", to which we must now add lawless lynchings of inanimate objects.

At the time we went to press, Jeremy Clarkson had not commented on this subject on Twitter.

Meanwhile, scientist, technologist and maverick philosopher  'Nigel Bennett' (@top1percentile) said of this subject "Police say by 'mindless criminals'.  Hardly, looks like a well planned operation."   which is pretty much in line with what most of the drones are saying here http://www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/greater-manchester-news/torched-the-stalybridge-camera-that-clocked-140-1280818

Or see where Stalybridge is, on our interactive map




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5 comments:

  1. Unknown31 January 2013 at 14:29

    Anyone who fails to notice a yellow painted box on a six foot pole next to the roadside deserves to be charged with driving without due care and attention.

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    Replies
    1. Embembooshkin31 January 2013 at 17:04

      Agreed.Also,thanks for pointing out where Stalybridge is. I've seen buses with Stalybridge on the front but up until now it's whereabouts was a mystery.

      Delete
    2. Unknown31 January 2013 at 17:20

      It's perfectly forgivable that you don't know where it is. Aside from charitable work, there's absolutely no reason to go there. I suppose that might be why people whizz through as fast as they can.

      Delete
  2. Infirmus Cygnus31 January 2013 at 17:17

    It is clear that Stalybridge really is the end of the world. Look at the map, all those lines indicating civilisation to the left, and up and down of the giant A. Nothing to the right.

    If we drove out there, is the Inflatable A lit up at night? It would be a marvelous tourist attraction and something to amuse the children.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unknown31 January 2013 at 18:29

      Don't go there at night. Have you never seen 'The League of Gentlemen'?

      Delete

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