National Chip Pan Fire Month Reaches a Blazing Climax

DO NOT try this at home.

Despite earlier indications that chip pan fires in Manchester were a thing of the past (http://choughworld.blogspot.co.uk/2013/02/chip-pan-fires-league-table.html) an elderly lady from Irlam has bucked this trend, "after a pan of food caught fire on an electric oven".

While it is not clear whether this was a traditional chip pan fire or not, we will ignore that detail, and declare this the final chip pan fire of National Chip Pan Fire month, and therefore the dubious winner.

http://www.manchesterfire.gov.uk/updates/incidents/28feb2013_woman_suffers_smoke_inhalation.aspx?utm_source=dlvr.it&utm_medium=twitter

Irlam, 'City' of Salford

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Tumble Driers as bad for you as Chips

As part of Choughworld's campaign to keep our homes safe from chip pan fires, we are adding washing machines and tumble driers to our hit list.

These innocent looking devices are just as capable of starting fires as the more traditional 'put the chip pan on when drunk and fall asleep' scenario.

Here is the Choughworld advice, on how to keep you, and your family safe.




1) Don't fry chips at home. 
2) Buy them from your local chippy.
3) On your way to the chippy, drop your clothes off at the launderette.
4) Once you've eaten your chips, pick up your washing and go home.
5) Watch the roads.
6) If you are foolish enough to use a tumble drier and it catches fire, do not throw water over it.
7) Make sure you have enough clean underwear so that you can pop out to the launderette in clean pants, so that if you do get run over, you won't be embarrassed at the hospital.

http://www.manchesterfire.gov.uk/updates/incidents/27feb_2012_two_electrical_appliance_fires-.aspx

MEN Jumps on the Chip Pan Fire Bandwagon

Following the success of Choughworld's campaign against Chip Pan Fires, the rival rag has suddenly 'discovered' the issue itself.

http://www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/greater-manchester-news/firefighters-been-prompted-restate-fire-safety-1327388

While we appreciate the support that a paper which targets those most likely to cause chip pan fires (drunks and imbeciles) it would be nice for them to credit where they get their stories from. 

It's just an odd coincidence that I set up Choughworld's Twitter service on Saturday, and by Monday they are running stories surprisingly similar to ours.  Here at Choughworld we always acknowledge Twitter as our source of all news and Wikipedia as the source of all facts.  Perhap MEN could be big enough to do the same?

As National Chip Pan Fire week continues, we will be monitoring the MEN and our legal department is poised to issue injunctions against any infringements of our copyright.

Are YOU an MEN hack, barely sober enough to string a few words together?  Comment NOW.

Chip Pan Fires League Table

As part of National Chip Pan Fire Week, Choughworld has carried out an in-depth report into the state of the Nation's chip pan fires.

Using state of the art technology, we have created a map of all Chip Pan Fires reported in the past 2 years, and overlaid them onto a map of the UK.

The results are startling



Yorkshire leads the way.  North, West, South and East Yorkshire together managed to set fire to a staggering 15 chip pans - 39% of the national total.

Compared to our 'always right even when aam wrong' neighbours, Greater Manchester scored a pathetic 4 fires.

Even adding in Lancashire, we didn't even scrape half of Yorkshire's score.

Here's those Scores in Full

County	Number of Fires
West Yorkshire	8
South Yorkshire	5
Greater Manchester	4
Staffordshire	4
Cambridgeshire	3
Lancashire	3
Cheshire	2
Hampshire	2
North Yorkshire	2
Nottinghamshire	2
Derbyshire	1
Devon	1
Hertfordshire	1
Kent	1
Merseyside	1
Northamptonshire	1
Surrey	1
Warwickshire	1
West Lothian	1
Total	44

We asked Labour Party leader Ed Milliband for a comment.  "This just goes to show how much work needs to be done, to make this country One Nation again," he opined.

Out of touch Tory Leader 'Dave' Cameron added, "This just goes to show the importance of maintaining the Union, and preventing those Scotch from running off with all our oil.  Only one fire in Scotland - are you sure those figures are right."

Yes Mr Cameron, they are right.  Twitter never lies, unlike some people...

What do YOU make of our National Chip Pan Roundup?

Our Chip Pan Fire Campaign Pays Off

Chips - Not on fire for once.

Fire Chiefs around Greater Manchester were full of praise for Choughworld's anti Chip Pan Fire campaign.

"This is just what we need to remind those morons not to get drunk and burn their houses down," said retired Fire Chief Aiden McGarry.

ROSPA (North West) has noticed a remarkable fall off in Chip Pan Fires in the North West since Choughworld began its campaign to mark National Chip Week.

Since Monday, there have been no Chip Pan Fires in Greater Manchester, whereas nationally, there have been no less than four.  If you extrapolate that annually then there will be no fires in Greater Manchester, but an astounding 486.66 nationally.

Now that's something to celebrate - with chips!

National Chip Week Marred by Chip Pan Fire in Oldham

Two fire engines were called on Sunday to a chip pan blaze in Oldham at the start of National Chip week.

Fire crews administered oxygen to a 95 year old lady.

@manchesterfire: Two elderly people caught in chip pan fire in Oldham http://t.co/3zQdpggX

By the time the fire crews had arrived, a 77 year old man had carried the burning pan outside, and it had gone out.   Here at Choughworld we don't recommend doing that.


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National Chip Pan Fire Week starts next week, and Fire Brigades (Services to the under 40s) will be demonstrating the devastating effect over the country.  There's one  in Preston today,  where surprisingly not everyone has already got first hand experience.